They Said What?!

Pregnancy and postpartum can be hard enough without everyone putting in their two cents or sharing their negative experiences with you. When I was pregnant, I had people say things to me that made me think “why would they ever say that to someone?”. Pregnancy is a time of massive change in your body and your life, and we should be supporting others through that time, not being negative towards them. The same goes with postpartum. Some of the things that people said to me really stick out, and I wanted to share two of those things with you.

When I was about 4 months pregnant, and most people now knew I was expecting, I had a lady say to me something along the lines of “you’ll never get your body back”. She knew that I was very active and valued taking care of myself, eating healthy, and exercising, so at first this comment REALLY bugged me. When she first said it to me I was appalled. I knew that my body wouldn’t be exactly the same as it was before, but I knew that I would work hard to feel confident and comfortable in my body again. However, this does take time and it is something I am still working on just over 4 months postpartum. The main thing I took out of this is that everyone’s body is different and just because someone doesn’t “have their body back” postpartum doesn’t mean that you can’t put in the work to feel confident and love your body how it is now!

The other thing that was said to me was a couple days postpartum. What really bugs me about this one is that it was a doctor who said it. I had some struggles getting started with breastfeeding, and a couple days postpartum I ended up going to the hospital with my little one because I thought she may have thrush. At this point I have no idea what I’m doing, I’m a few days postpartum and just trying my best to figure this thing out. We wait a while for the doctor and then when he comes in I explain to him I think she might have thrush. He takes a look, asks some questions, and asks whether I’m bottle or breastfeeding. I tell him breastfeeding, to which he replies that “maybe she just doesn’t like your nipple. Try a bottle.” I can not believe that he said that to me! Isn’t natural “better” than man-made? I definitely understand that some choose bottle feeding and that is a valid choice, or they can't breastfeed for various reasons, but for me I really wanted to breastfeed! Instead of helping me like a doctor should, I felt he brushed off the problem. (Side note: she didn’t end up having thrush.) What this comment did was make me even MORE determined to prove him wrong and to get breastfeeding well established, and also to not want to see that doctor again. I worked with a lactation consultant to be able to breastfeed successfully (more about this in another post later on!) and put in a lot of time and effort to feed my girl this way.

What crazy thing(s) have people said to you during pregnancy or postpartum? How did their comments affect you?

Remember, mama, that while others may have their opinions and thoughts, ultimately YOU get to decide what is right for you and your baby, and you are doing an amazing job!